What is lust? How to overcome lust?

“The lust for comfort, that stealthy thing that enters the house a guest, and then becomes a host, and then a master.” -Khalil Gibran

According to the Bhagawat Gita, “lust can destroy the power of thinking, make a slave, and completely end self-realization.”

Lust is a strong desire or craving for something, usually of a sexual nature. It is an intense and overwhelming feeling of attraction towards someone or something that is primarily driven by physical desire rather than emotional connection or love. It can manifest as a powerful urge to engage in sexual activity or to possess and consume something that brings pleasure or excitement. While lust can be a natural and normal human emotion, it can also be destructive when it becomes an uncontrollable or harmful obsession.

We have heard many stories from history and our glorious religious scriptures, how kingdoms collapsed, how kings lost their royalty, and about the fierce battles that were fought just because the king was obsessed with other women.

Ravana, one of the most learned people, the demon with the ten heads had to give up his life and empire for a woman “Sita”. He was defeated in the battle by Sri Ram, and he was be-headed.

One of the major causes of the Mahabharata battle was Duryodhana’s lust for power, kingdom, and the sole intention to own it all unrighteously.

Allaudin Khilji was unable in the pursuit of Padmavati but possessed only anger, ignorance, and sheer madness as a result of the rejection.

Shah Jahan was never successful as a monarch due to his unsatiable lust for women. In the end, it is crucial to stop the feeling when it is not able to give any positive energy to the human soul or humanity.

Lust is a primal and instinctual desire that arises from our most basic human needs and drives. It is a natural human emotion that anyone can feel at any time, although its intensity and expression may vary depending on the individual.

At its core, lust is an intense physical attraction towards someone or something that is often driven by sexual desire. This desire may be fuelled by a variety of factors, including physical appearance, pheromones, or the stimulation of certain sensory stimuli. It can be a powerful force that can overwhelm and consume us, leading to impulsive actions and irrational behavior.

Is lust good or bad?

Lust, like many other human emotions, is not inherently good or bad. It is a natural and normal aspect of human sexuality that can bring pleasure and excitement when experienced healthily and respectfully.

Positive aspect of lust

When lust is expressed in a consensual and respectful way between two adults, it can lead to enjoyable sexual experiences and deepen intimacy and connection. In this context, lust can be seen as a positive and healthy aspect of human sexuality.

Negative aspect of lust

However, when lust becomes an obsession or is expressed in a harmful or disrespectful way, it can have negative consequences for both the individual experiencing it and for those around them. It can lead to objectification, exploitation, and disrespect of others, and can interfere with our ability to form healthy and meaningful relationships.
Therefore, it is important to recognize and manage our lustful desires responsibly and respectfully. This involves being aware of our motivations and impulses, setting appropriate boundaries, and treating others with kindness and respect. With the right mindset and approach, we can harness the energy of our lustful desires and channel them into positive and fulfilling experiences.

How to overcome lust

Overcoming lust can be challenging, but it is possible with the right mindset, tools, and strategies. Here are five steps that can help you overcome lust:

Acknowledge and accept your lustful desires:

The first step to overcoming lust is to acknowledge and accept that you have these desires. It is a normal and natural aspect of human sexuality and denying or repressing it can lead to negative consequences. By accepting your desires, you can begin to explore them healthily and respectfully.

• Take a minute to note, the feelings that are erupting in your mind.
• Be watchful and get clarity to differentiate between love and lust.
• If it is lust, then accept it as just any other negative feeling.
• Instead of fanning this feeling of lust by trying to satisfy it through various means, try to channelize these thoughts in a productive way.
• Do not indulge in unacceptable activities, try to find healthy ways to navigate these feelings.
• It is ok to have these feelings but to breed them intentionally and act upon them is not ok.
• Indulge in various creative activities and keep yourself occupied. Creativity will give you the same amount of dopamine that you receive by apologetically satisfying your lust.
• Change the way you look at the person. Instead of looking at the person in an objectifying way try to consider the person as just any other human being.

Identify triggers and avoid them:

Lustful desires can be triggered by a variety of factors such as visual stimuli, certain environments, or emotional states. Identify what triggers your lustful desires and take steps to avoid them or minimize exposure to them. For example, if you find that viewing certain types of content online triggers your lustful desires, you may want to consider installing a website blocker or seeking out healthier alternatives.

• It is very important to understand how and why you are getting these lustful feelings.
• Many times, it is hormonal. Especially in teenagers, who are still exploring their sexuality and for whom sex is a curiosity.
• Be watchful of the content that you are watching or reading. Consider giving up on all those things that are provoking lustful thoughts in you.
• Do not try to practice “self-love” in a wrong way. Acceptance is the first step towards betterment.

Develop healthy coping mechanisms:

When you feel overwhelmed by lustful desires, having healthy coping mechanisms in place can be helpful. These can include physical activity, meditation, or talking to a trusted friend or counselor. By developing healthy coping mechanisms, you can better manage your desires and avoid acting on them impulsively.

• Lustful thoughts can be quite disturbing. They can be a source of major distraction.
• It brings down one’s productivity.
• Get help, talk to a therapist or a counselor to deal with these thoughts.
• Find out other coping strategies to deal with these thoughts. Indulge in various physical activities, hit the gym keep yourself engaged.

Practice mindfulness:

Practicing mindfulness can help you stay present and focused on the present moment, rather than being consumed by lustful thoughts and desires. Mindfulness techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga can be effective in reducing stress and anxiety, which can be underlying triggers for lustful desires.

• Lustful desires or sexual thoughts are another way of mind to deal with stress. Or one can say that we indulge in these activities as a coping mechanism to deal with stress & anxiety.
• Practicing mindfulness, and other relaxation techniques will help us deal with stress, resulting in less lustful thoughts.
• Lustful thoughts are as good as negative thoughts. While working on mindfulness, take in deep breaths, and as you release air imagine letting go of all the negative thoughts and lustful desires. This will make you feel light.

Build meaningful and fulfilling relationships:

Building meaningful and fulfilling relationships with others can help you overcome lustful desires by providing emotional connection and support. Invest in relationships with friends, family, and romantic partners that are built on mutual respect, trust, and communication. By building these types of relationships, you can reduce feelings of loneliness and find fulfillment in meaningful connections.

• Meaningful relationships make you feel complete from within. This takes off lustful thoughts from the mind.
• When a person is lonely, lust and lustful thoughts make a castle in one’s mind. Hence keeping busy with family, friends, and other people in a productive way will surely help.
• Relationships need not be romantic always. Bonds beyond families and romantic partners equally add meaning to life. This will take away the feeling of loneliness.

Final Word

Overcoming lust is a process that requires self-awareness, self-control, and a commitment to personal growth. While it may be difficult to acknowledge and address the underlying emotions and behaviors that fuel lustful desires, it is essential to do so to live a more fulfilling and satisfying life.

One important step in overcoming lust is to accept your desires without judgment or shame. Recognize that it is normal to experience sexual desires and attraction, but also understand that acting on those desires in unhealthy or destructive ways can have negative consequences for yourself and others. In summary, overcoming lust involves accepting your desires, identifying triggers, developing healthy coping mechanisms, practicing mindfulness, and building meaningful relationships. It takes time and effort, but by taking these steps, you can overcome lustful desires and live a more fulfilling and satisfying life.

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